Today’s Moron – Mark A. Guenther

This moron is 22-years old and alledgedly murdered his daughter.  Police were called to his residence and found his 15-month old daughter unresponsive.  She later died at the hospital from injuries alledgedly sustained at the hand of Mark A. Guenther. 

This freak admitted to striking her and hitting her head on the floor.  The little girl was covered in bruises and her skull was fractured.  Doctors say it was a prolonged time of abuse.  It takes a man with a very small penis to beat up a helpless 15-month old baby!

Hopefully, when he is in prison for a long, long time that some big dudes will treat him with the same respect he treated his daughter.  There is no reason an innocent baby should be subjected to such torture in their short life.  What a disgusting person Mark A. Guenther is!

Today’s Moron – The Fiqh Council of North America

The Fiqh Council of North America, a group of Islamic scholars, has issued a Fatwa against using airport body scanners because the Muslim tradition of modesty would be violated. 

Now, this is moronic for so many reasons.  First, it was these very people that caused the need for these body scanners.  Maybe if these moron’s would issue a Fatwa against suicide bombing, there wouldn’t be as much of a need for these scanners.  But, instead, they attack the prevention of their own peoples murderous bombing attacks.

Also, modesty is their main concern?  Really?  Well, if modesty is that important than don’t get on a plane.  The body scanners are becoming the norm at airports for security, and if they don’t want to use them they don’t need to fly.  Who the hell do they think they are, anyways, combatting one of our only lines of defense against their own extremist idiots?  Don’t want to use them, then take Greyhound!

Amazingly enough, to bypass these simple body scanners, the idiot group The Fiqh Council of North America have decided that a pat down of their private parts is less intrusive than a black and white outline of their body on a screen for two seconds.  Well, then I suggest TSA agents REALLY pat down the Muslims that refuse to go through the scanners.  They should get patted and patted and patted.  Have at it!

Come on, you morons, step into reality.  If your retarded people would stop attempting to bomb us, we would not need to come up with superior security devices that invade your privacy.  So, the end of the game starts with you people.  Until then, scan or drive!

Today’s Moron – Lyndon Barfield Junior

It is still shockingly amazing just how stupid and ignorant some people out there actually are.  Take Lyndon Barfield Junior.  This moronic 21-year old jerk decided to give his 5-month old baby a bath in scalding hot water.  The water was so hot that it took the skin right off his back.

Thankfully arrested, Lyndon Barfield Junior will be charged with Child Neglect.  Other charges may be filed.  He says it was a mistake.  Regardless, he is a moron for making such an ignorant mistake when his baby’s welfare was at stake.

Today’s Moron – Joshua Ryan Tabor

This total moron decided that since his little 4-year-old daughter wouldn’t say the ABC’s for him, that he would try to coerce her to do what he asked by water-boarding her!

When the girl ‘wouldn’t say her letters’ Joshua Ryan Tabor, a US soldier, and his equally as ignorant girlfriend apparently enjoyed torturing this poor girl.  The girlfriend stated that when the little girl wet herself, she was required to sit in urine soaked clothes for extended periods of time.

The idiot actually doesn’t feel there is anything wrong with his actions.  He was arrested anyway and for abusing the little girl.

Today’s Moron – Garret Wayne Pierce

21-year old Garret Wayne Pierce doesn’t have much to go on these days, especially since he is behind bars.  What got him behind bars?  Well, you might say breaking into cars to try to find money is the reason.  But, the real reason is that Garret Wayne Pierce is behind bars tonight because he just aint too smart. 

It all happened last night when South Carolina got a rare dusting of snow.  This is when Garret Wayne Pierce set out from his home to walk through neighborhoods close by breaking into cars and searching them for money or valuables.  After ransacking about 18 cars, he heads home on foot – not thinking that with a fresh dusting of snow, his shoe tracks would be noticeable going from car to car to car – and eventually right to the back door of his house.  The police simply followed his tracks in the snow and arrested him when they got to his door. 

Talk about leaving a trail for the cops!  What a moron!  I bet he won’t be committing any crimes in the snow from now on.

Today’s Moron – Dainley Dewayne Green

This foul disgusting piece of work, Dainley Dewayne Green, has been arrested on animal and child abuse charges in Georgia.  The charges stem from a call from this moron’s wife.  She told police that Dainley Dewayne Green was very violent with her, and that to punish their two children, he would savagely abuse the kids small dachsund making them watch in horror.

What kind of small-penis waste of life would take his aggressions out on an 18-pound little dog just to torture his own children?  This freak needs to be put away for a very long, long time.  The police have arrested him and charged him already, but more charges may be filed.  Hopefully, enough charges to keep this jerk off the streets and away from innocent kids and animals for the rest of his miserable, disgusting, waste of a life.

Today’s Moron – George Shipps

George Shipps, a South Boston 47-year old father of five grown children, was arrested yesterday for possession of child pornography.  That is not the most shocking thing in the world – it does happen.  What is shocking is the amount of child porn that he possessed.  He apparently had over 16,000 files of kiddie porn including a movie that was 75-minutes long of sexual abuse of young girls around 5 or 6 years old.

This man was identified as the largest distribution point for child porn in the world!  Now, thankfully, he has been arrested, and the proof is there to keep him behind bars until he is dead and in hell.

What a disgusting, pathetic excuse for a human being!  This foul and perverted man helped a child porn industry that preys on the innocence of childhood and he deserves to pay a huge price for his crime.  He needs to be locked away for life with free reign on his butt by all the big, tough and horny guys in prison.

Today’s Moron – Laura Silsby & Friends

Laura Silsby and her group of 9 friends traveled to Haiti after the devastating earthquake to help children.  That is a pretty noble and admirable act – for these people to give of themselves to help a nation in misery.

However, it all turned badly when these ten idiots were arrested trying to enter the Dominican Republic with 33 children that had no passports, no identification, no papers and no documentation.  They just gathered children in the streets, put them in a bus, and took off to try to remove them from their home country and take them to the United States.

Now, who in the hell do these people think they are?  Who has the right to remove children from their country without permission?  Who has the right to take kids off the streets without 100% verifying that they are in fact orphans.

It turned out that there were parents for many of these kids and that there was no permission given or even asked for.  These moron’s go down there in the name of God defying the rules of law of the countries involved – which is completely against any Biblical standard – and try to kidnap kids.  This is perhaps the most anti-God thing someone could do.

And to think that being poor is worse than being without their parents!  Who has the right to decide that?  Just because these kids will live in poverty they may still have loving parents.  Poor is not anti-Christian – you stupid freaks!  Why don’t you go back home – when you get out of jail – and think about what you did and why you give other good Christians around the world a bad name to many!

Today’s Moron – Guy Harlan

We usually don’t use a dead person for The Daily Moron, but in this case it is warranted.  Guy Harlan, 44 years old, has been a thief his whole life, and his rap sheet is evidence of his career of crime.  But, his stealing today got him more than arrested – it got him dead.

Guy Harlan was trying to steal copper wiring to melt down and sell, but failed to think that the wiring may be hooked up to something conducing electricity.  It shocked Guy Harlan – to death!  And when it did, his accomplice, partner-in-crime, fled the scene leaving poor Guy Harlan there to sizzle.

Today’s Moron – Hans Kurt Kubus

This German guy was visiting New Zealand and decided that he wanted to smuggle out some lizards to sell back home.  Well, his genius method for the smuggling was to put 44 small lizards – alive – in his underwear and head to the Christchurch International Airport in New Zealand to head home. 

He wanted to board his flight with all 44 geckos and skinks in a hand-sewn package in his underwear.  He has been sentenced to prison and given a fine for illegally poacing protected species in New Zealand.  But it is amazing that this freak thought that putting these in his underwear would be successful.